Shampoo

I was taking a shower the other day and as I was drying off I started thinking about how over 2 months ago I got a call from Dad telling me about mom. I had just gotten back from camping with Brett up in the Mountains. It was beautiful up there. Sometime I think God allowed me to experience His light before He took me into the darkness.

But as I was drying off I started thinking about how after getting home that day I got all my things together to go down to the hospital where my mom was staying. Everything seemed so weird. Like the air I was breathing was jelly or something.

That time seems so long ago. It didn't seem real.

And I'm thinking to myself, "did that really happen? Is my mom really gone?" I look around me and I see a shampoo bottle. My mom always gave me boxes of bathroom supplies. Randomly. I think sometimes she didn't think I thought about buying the everyday things and she just wanted to help me out. I don't think I ever spent money on shampoo or soap before mom was diagnosed with cancer.

I buy my own shampoo now. Lever 2000 is the cheapest soap I've found and you can get it in bulk. I almost don't want to finish off this last bottle of shampoo. It's the last one mom got me before she left us.

I don't know if thats a weird thought. I don't know what is a normal thought after going through something like this. I do know that one thought goes through my head on a regular basis that probably is normal...

...I miss mom.